From the screenwriter of Yaji and Kita and the absolutely sublime Ping Pong comes a title that I for one have been salivating over since it was first announced on Twitch earlier this year. MAIKO HAAAAN!!! is a manic, unhinged saga with enough plot twists and turns to fill out 3 or 4 Hollywood films. It manages to pack it all into its lean 90 minutes by running at a coke-fueled 78 rpm pace. Silly, electrifyingly, vibrant, and VERY Japanese, Maiko Haaaan!!! follows salaryman Kimihiko Onizuka (veteran wacky TV comedian Sadao Abe) on his single-minded quest to live the ultimate Maiko (apprentice Geisha) experience:strip baseball. Cultural and economic barriers seem to thwart him at every turn, causing him to take the most ridiculously circuitous route imaginable to the Geisha inner sanctum. Although filmed on a relatively small budget, the costumes and sets explode off the screen, as do the extremely over-the-top performances. The sheer “Japan-ness” of MAIKO HAAAAN!!! almost certainly means there will be no stateside release of this film in theaters. But for the Sinophiles that I know Fantastic Fest to harbor, this screening will be a mainline dose of that sticky-sweet Rising Sun heroin. The title translates to a shriek of Miss Maiko!!! (4 aaaas and 3 exclamation points). You’ll hear Sadao Abe shout it so often during the film you will probably wake up screaming it in your sleep, and that, my friend, means sweet dreams. (Tim League, Fantastic Fest)